Best of Dear Abby

Just try to overlook the fact that I have been absent for shamefully too long. The worst part it is does not mean I will be a regular now, either. But whenever I see something so interesting that it has to be shared, I will be here. Imagine me as the weird, absentee uncle that still gives cool Christmas presents.

Pauline Friedman Phillips, or Dear Abby, passed away last week at the age of 94. This is a collection of 10 of her witticisms from the 13 compiled by The Week. I knew she was proper but had no idea she was so sharp and present.

Dear Abby: My boyfriend is going to be 20 years old next month. I’d like to give him something nice for his birthday. What do you think he’d like? —Carol
Dear Carol: Nevermind what he’d like, give him a tie.

Dear Abby: Our son married a girl when he was in the service. They were married in February and she had an 8 1/2-pound baby girl in August. She said the baby was premature. Can an 8 1/2-pound baby be this premature? —Wanting to Know
Dear Wanting: The baby was on time. The wedding was late. Forget it.

Dear Abby: Is it possible for a man to be in love with two women at the same time? —Jake
Dear Jake: Yes, and also hazardous.

Dear Abby: I’ve been going with this girl for a year. How can I get her to say yes? —Don
Dear Don: What’s the question?

Dear Abby: I’ve been going steady with this man for six years. We see each other every night. He says he loves me, and I know I love him, but he never mentions marriage. Do you think he’s going out with me just for what he can get? —Gertie
Dear Gertie: I don’t know. What’s he getting?

Dear Abby: What’s the difference between a wife and a mistress? —Bess
Dear Bess: Night and Day.

Dear Abby: About four months ago, the house across the street was sold to a “father and son” — or so we thought. We later learned it was an older man about 50 and a young fellow about 24. This was a respectable neighborhood before this “odd couple” moved in. They have all sorts of strange-looking company. Men who look like women, women who look like men, blacks, whites, Indians. Yesterday I even saw two nuns go in there!… Abby, these weirdos are wrecking our property values! How can we improve the quality of this once-respectable neighborhood? —Up In Arms
Dear UP: You could move. 

Dear Abby: I joined the Navy to see the world. I’ve seen it. Now, how do I get out?
Dear Navy: Simple. Go to your superior officer and say these 2 words: I’m Gay.

Dear Abby: I have always wanted to have my family history traced, but I can’t afford to spend a lot of money to do it. Have you any suggestions? —M.J.B. in Oakland, Calif.
Dear M.J.B.: Yes. Run for a public office.

Dear Abby: Are birth control pills deductible? —Bertie
Dear Bertie: Only if they don’t work.

9/11 on Both Sides

I usually do not like to talk about this day because it is very weighed and personal in its nature. However, this thoughtful perspective on the commemoration of September 11 forced me to make an exception. This is an excerpt of the piece written by Ben Cohen, editor-founder of The Daily Banter.

But today should serve not only as a reminder of the crime, but the enormous spirit of collaboration, kindness and humanity that came after it. The world watched in amazement as Americans came together to help each other, citizens risking their lives to pull strangers out of the rubble, money flooding in from rich and poor alike to help victims, monuments, vigils, charities, support groups and a limitless well of empathy. It was an amazing spectacle and a testament to the strength of human decency in the face of brutality.

9/11 was a tragedy and we should remember not only the Americans who died, but the Afghanis and Iraqis who suffered too. Because if we don’t, we risk repeating the same mistakes again – the belief that the outside world doesn’t matter with people whose lives are unimportant. We found out on 9/11 that our interference in the outside world has consequences, that they will fight back and use violence to achieve their ends, just as we will. Because violence begets violence, and once you start it is almost impossible to stop.

Perhaps we could remember the victims of 9/11 and pay homage to their unwitting sacrifice by stopping the cycle. And that starts with the understanding that our lives are not more important than theirs and remembering their suffering in equal part to our own.

 

If you don’t view juxtaposition as mind game, read on.

 

Below are a few images from IsraelLovesIran.com. It was started by a father/teacher/graphic designer who was tired of feeling helpless by the growing distorted communication between the people of the two nations. He put up a poster online with his daughter in hand and a remarkably penetrative, succinct caption. On the website it says:

Within hours tens of Israelis posted their own pictures with the same message.

After 24 hours messages from Iran started to arrive. People, moved to tears, wrote back “we love you too”. Today, just few month later, we are a community of 63 countries.
More than 67000 people are on our web-page.

New Pages from around the world  with the same message and same logo are born every week… we call this movement for peace : The ”WE LOVE YOU” community.

They have received millions of hits and news organizations from around the world have mentioned this movement.

Needless to say, I am deeply moved.

Consider spreading the word.

 

Ronny Edry, the man who started it all.

Know any good Arab jokes?

Yes, I know, dangerous territory. No one likes beating the underdog… but comedian Russel Peters does not mind. He also has a point.

A little R rated but funny.

3 random goldies from 3 big names

1. Elton John and Kiki Dee

 

2. The very seductive Ms. James!

 

3. The Wonder man

Seriously?!

Or SRSLY. as Alexandra Fiber and Danielle Gibson call it. These two ladies make short, snappy videos loosely based on their semi-glam lives in New York. Funny stuff. They have more but these were the best so far.

Pillow talk gone wrong

Do YOU know when Harry met Sally?

Their most popular video yet.

Too much of a supportive friend

My favorite =)

5 cool covers that almost outdo the original

Somehow I like to post covers of popular songs. I don’t intend to but I stumble across them (or madly search for a good alternative).

1. Original: Teenage Dream – Katy Perry

Cover: Glee. Everybody must have heard this already because it became Glee’s most popular download on iTunes ever. Perry herself admired it; said it made her cry. For anyone who cares to hear an acoustic version.

2. Original: Brother Louie – Hot Chocolate

Cover: Stories. This one was just 6 months after UK’s Hot Chocolate released their track in 1973 to get to the top ten in the UK singles chart. Yet the cover by Stories reached #1 on Billboard Hot 100 in USA. On a side note, Modern Talking’s Brother Louie has nothing to do with this, but has the same title.

3. Original: What Makes You Beautiful – One Direction.

Cover: Boyce Avenue. I know what you’re thinking… anything will be better than the original, but the truth is that Boyce is remarkable at acoustic renditions. They manage to make any song sound so gentle and romantic. These guys deserve a separate post of their own. They are also popular! They have already gone on worldwide tours.

4. Original:  Angel of the Morning – written and composed by Chip Taylor.

Cover: Juice Newton. It’s hard to say who made the very first release because of its complicated history. But to my ears nothing is better than Juice’s. Not Chip’s own version, not by Merrilee Rush, Olivia Newton John, Dusty Springfield, and dare I say it, not even Nina Simone. It got to #4 in the Billboard Hot 100 and #1 in the Billboard Adult Contemporary chart in 1981.

Sadly, there are only 2 things that immediately come to my mind when I hear this artist’s name

 

 

 

 

5. Original: Someone Like You – Adele

Cover: Matt Jackson. Okay, this is not better, but it’s a nice variety in a male voice. This one was quite a challenge. Originally I was going to post youtube’s TheStrangerSpeaks version but due to copyright the video went private 😦 Anyway, Matt does a a pretty darn good job (the high parts need work).

Earth from space — gotta’ love the Blue Planet

If you ever wondered what lightning and storm clouds on Earth look like for Zeus or Darth Vader, this video should help.

5 songs for your next Quiet Time

Everyone needs some R&R: long grueling day, lost your keys, boss won’t stop hovering over you, spilled milk, or when it seems every friggin person got up in the morning just to get in your hair. Some quiet music helps.

 

 

 

 

 

Finally, even some Kenny G. You need to have talent to even become a cliche.

I’d hate to dance after these two

Few things in life would be more devastating than to follow up on stage after these two perform.

Will the environment suffer if the world’s poor get a better standard of living?

The answer is, no. According to Oxfam:

• Providing enough food for the 13% of the world’s people who suffer from hunger means raising world food supplies by just 1%.

• Providing electricity to the 19% of people who currently have none would raise global carbon emissions by just 1%.

• Bringing everyone above the global absolute poverty line ($1.25 a day) would need just 0.2% of global income.

• In other words, it is not the needs of the poor that threaten the biosphere, but the demands of the rich. Half the world’s carbon emissions are produced by just 11% of its people, while, with grim symmetry, 50% of the world’s people produce just 11% of its emissions. Animal feed used in the EU alone, which accounts for just 7% of the world’s people, uses up 33% of the planet’s sustainable nitrogen budget.

So it is the rich that are using up the global resource budget.

Toss these statistics at someone’s face the next time they tell you that feeding the poor means your next bill at Walmart or Carrefour is going to cost more; I like to stand armed.

 

You can read the full article by George Monbiot at the Guardian from where this information was obtained.